07/13/2026
Hark! Attend and give ear!
The heavens do portend a rising warmth to vex our troubled shores this sennight! Let every base peasant and rude mechanical straightway feed his metal steed with lightning spark, whilst our cruel overlords, in their grasping tyranny, decree a fickle fading of the public power. Thus do they plot to thwart thee, and deny thy weary bones the solace of a cooling breeze!
In other words, the heat is coming, you must charge your cars whilst the electric companies enact rolling brownouts and deny you proper air conditioning!