09/04/2026
☹️ FRESH HOP REPENTANCE ☹️
Our fresh hop is FINALLY here, and it comes with an overdue apology...
You may have noticed that, unlike the last two years, this fresh hop beer has no reference to PORK. And we’ve all got to thank for that. We had absolutely no idea that employing Aotearoa's most notorious vandal could, in any way shape or form, be supporting crime. We had been shamefully hoodwinked by evil itself! has shown us the error of our ways! And we will be eternally grateful for that.
Because we’re so so deeply ashamed of our actions and so so so sorry for all the harm we have caused, this years Fresh Hop is a form of repentance. The cleansing properties of an Xtra Pale Ale paired with Freestyle Hops’ finest Riwaka, will exorcise any evil spirits, purify the soul and help us all avoid eternal damnation! And if this beer isn’t enough to satiate your desire for public self-flagellation, we’ve even fired our General Manager who endorsed the corruptive idea of collaborating with the lawless wrongdoer PORKSTA in the first place…
All it took was one brave soul speaking out to show us our sinful ways. Thank you so very much , you’re the reason this beer exists. In ’s name.
Amen.
