23/12/2025
A wee bit of Christmas banter etiquette:
FOR ALL PEOPLE DRINKING IN PUBS THIS TIME OF YEAR!!!!
Going to the pub for your Christmas party or just for a celebratory few over the festive period? Here are a few hints and tips to make sure you don't tip the staff over the edge.....
1) If you are ordering a round of 8 drinks do NOT order Guinness last. The bar person will hate you from this moment on.
2) If a waitress is stood holding 4 red hot plates and asks who ordered turkey? Do not pipe up with Keith and Gladys are having turkey and look at them like they should know who they all individually are. The plates are now burning into their arms.
3) NEVER tap coins on the bar, wave a note, whistle, bang your glass or shout "oy". You will be instantly labelled a t**t and served last.
4) Do not order more than you can drink at last orders. When the pub shuts at half 12 the staff want to go home as they are probably back the next morning. You sat there with a full pint half an hour after time saying I'm drinking it cos I paid for it makes you an inconsiderate ar****le.
5) Don't try and get served after time is called. The tills have gone, we can't legally serve you. Your insistence that you know the landlord and he would let you is absolute bull and chance are when I tell him about this he will refer to you as the tosser.
6) If there is a bar full of people waiting to be served do not order 2 lattes, a mocha and a hot chocolate. Just don't. Don't be that person. It's a pub not costa.
7) Do not rearrange the furniture. Chances are the chairs are not blocking a path through the pub for a reason. Waiters do not wish to climb over you while holding piping hot food. Unless you want to feel what it's like to wear a red hot Xmas dinner don't be a do**he.
8 ) If you see that the staff are run off their feet, running out of glasses and have several people waiting to be served do not, I repeat DO NOT, say "you could do with some more staff on". Chances are staff are feeling frazzled, someone may have rang in sick or let them down at the last minute. Unless you can pull a member of staff out of your arse your comments are not needed.
9) Don't be the tv tosser. Staff behind the bar are trying to serve everyone as a priority. Changing the tv channel or putting subtitles on is not a priority. If you love tv that much go home n watch it in the comfort of your armchair!
10) The final one. The most important one. Be nice! It's busy. Staff in hospitality work long hours over the festive period often missing out on parties and family time to serve you. They enjoy it mostly and are there to give you great service. You would be appalled if we didn't say Please and thank you or swore at you or were rude to you, so don't do it to us.
Have a great festive period and you will be served with a smile as long as you remember not to be an arse ๐
