The Cuckoo's Nest - Chorley

06/06/2020

The almost give away of Cuckoo’s stock.

All bottles @ 75 cl unless otherwise stated.

Table of content goes as :-
F = Full
N/F = Nearly Full only a couple of tots taken
¾ = three qtr full
½ = half full
1/3rd = a third left
All measurement

White wine Ponte Guglie X 2 @ £3.00 each or £5.00 for two
Martini extra dry 1 ltr ¾ full X1 @ £5.00
JOB LOT 4x Sourz shots (various flavours) all approx. half full £ 20.00 the lot
Smirnoff vodka 1 ltr (NF) £15.00
Smirnoff apple vodka (1/3rd) £5.00
Smirnoff raspberry vodka (1/3rd) £5.00
Malibu (NF) £10.00
Jack Daniels No7 1 ltr (NF) £25.00
A couple of give aways (with an order) these only have a few shots left in them, Bacardi and Baileys. (Just say if you want them)
150ml cans of mixers Schweppes ginger ale x 8 £2.40
2 X 1ltr coke 2x 1ltr diet coke 1x1ltr Asda lemonade £5.00 the lot
Lime and blackcurrant cordials (F) £2.00 for both.

Cash or card accepted.
Collection or will only deliver in Chorley area only as my car is knackered.
Call or txt me your order 07542 275571.

27/05/2020

As some of you may know already.
It is with great regret that I must inform you all, that the cuckoo's nest will not be reopening at the end of lockdown (whenever that may be)..
Those of you who know me will understand the reasons I have made this decision and there are many reasons, my personal health, social distancing, cash etc, etc. I was supposed to be handing the keys back this Friday 29th but there has been at best a clitch!
I would like to thank you from my heart, to all my customers and friends for your patronage and support during the times high and low.
But I bow out gracefully and my head held high, knowing what a cracking little bar I had.
Thank you all and see you on the other side of a bar somewhere soon. Tony

17/04/2020

SOLD OUT!
Hello again fellow cuckoo's.
Further to my post yesterday about the (almost) freebie give away.
I have a cask of Sambrooks pale ale, which I'm going to put into 5ltr bag in boxes, (which works out at nearly 9 pints).
All I ask is for a donation, which I will be sending to Captain John's NHS fund, I am not taking any costs from this so 100% will be going to the NHS.
(Only a suggestion but I would say minimum a pound a pint) payment either PayPal or by card on collection, I cannot deliver my car is buggered.
If you want one and yes it will be limited availability let me know, they should be available later this afternoon, again collection only from the cuckoo's nest.
Regards, stay safe. Tony.

16/04/2020

Hiya fellow cuckoo's,
Hope you are all safe and well.
WATCH THIS SPACE!
For an (almost) freebie give away, more info coming soon.
To help me in this (almost) freebie give away, has anyone got an old, but working set of bathroom scales they can either give or loan me for a few days, thanks in advance. Tony

10/04/2020

Good morning all, to help keep you occupied over the Easter weekend, I have come up with a little spot the difference competition with prizes, there will follow a series of 4 photos, the first will be the master photo. Photo No.2 will have 9 (nine) differences. Photo No.3 will have a further 5 (five) differences and Photo No.4 again will have another 5 (five) changes.
DO NOT POST THE ANSWERS ON THIS POST!
Instead message me the answers, the first person to msg me the correct differences for photo (2) nine differences will win a pint.
The first person to msg with the photo (2) and next photo (3) further 5 differences will win two pints.
Finally the first person to msg with all 19 differences from photos 2,3 and 4 will win 3 pints or drinks equivalent to the price of 3 pints.
Entries close at 6pm Easter Monday.
Drinks available when the cuckoo's nest reopens, good luck have fun. Tony.

09/04/2020

Just about sorted for Easter weekend 😁🍻

06/04/2020

Hiya all, hope you are all well. To any cider drinkers out there.
I have a 20ltr bag in box Happy Daze cider going for grabs, it's got a good bbf date, 13/09/20 but has been opened and about 3ltrs used. Wanting £30 as I don't drink cider. P.s. can't deliver as car is goosed 😞 sorry. Tony

04/04/2020

30/03/2020

BARTENDERS LET OUT FROM BEHIND THEIR BARS
Bartenders, while normally playful and snarky individuals when viewed in their natural habitats, have recently been let out from behind the bars to forage for supplies with the general public, whom they so passive aggressively hate.
Should you encounter one of these reclusive creatures, please respect the wild animals they can be and treat them as such.
Normally nocturnal creatures, due to COVID19 virus, bartenders have been forced into the daytime in search of food, alcohol, ci******es and toilet paper. Alcohol, a main staple in their diet is no longer available at their preferred watering hole and while a bartender can live for up to 2 weeks on ci******es alone, toilet paper is a motivating factor. Much akin to animals in captivity, they have become reliant on the well meaning regulars to deliver food to them in their respective enclosures. Without these normal feedings, their blood sugar is running low and sarcasm is high, they are assumed to be hangry.
Bartenders seen during the quarantine should not be approached as are most likely ornery, sober and generally not in the mood for your bu****it.
You can easily identify a bartender if they have a disheveled appearance, are wearing sweatpants with no makeup and/or are noticeably disoriented by all the lights.
After years of being behind bars, subjected to the bustling parade of visitors that come to see them, older bartenders have embraced the introverted lifestyle. Therefore making them the most dangerous to encounter. Keep in mind these older, wiser, keepers of secrets are to be assumed grumpy, sober (until determined otherwise) and most definitely hoping to avoid human interaction. Younger, less experienced bartenders are more apt to seek attention, be advised they can be skittish, emotionally unstable and down right annoying. You may regret the interaction.
Please do not startle the bartender, nor initiate contact with this fragile, misplaced and often misunderstood creature. If you think the bartender may be smiling, be aware this is them showing their teeth and should be seen as a sign of aggression. Slowly back away and f**k right off. If you are lucky enough to encounter one in the wild, please remain calm, be respectful and slowly retreat to the safety of your own kind.
This has been a PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

26/03/2020

To all friends and customers take time to check in and let me know your safe and well, once again thank you all for support. X Tony.

21/03/2020

Good morning all,
I'm going to give the take away service a go, the cuckoo's will be open from 17:00 to 19:00 for take away only.
BRING YOUR OWN SUITABLE DRINKS CONTAINER.
Cask beer £2.50 a pint
Lagers £3.00 a pint
Cider £2.50 a pint
Cask beer and larger available at the moment
Old mill blonde (cask)
One brew over the cuckoo's nest (cask)
Atlantic pale ale (keg)
Pravha Pils
Cuckoo's Nest craft lager.
Happy Daze still cider
When it's gone it's gone.
MAX of 4 customers in the premises at any time. Thank you