M-Cat's house

21/08/2013

bye bye mcat's house...

24/04/2013

When is Ish leaving?

Ish shocked scores of people yesterday and started a frenzy of speculation by appearing to leave M-Cat’s House for what is estimated to be the 927th time. After completely empty claims and statements totaling over 8 hours, Ish is reported to have marched out of the door, waved grandly over his shoulder and said: “I’ll see you all when I get back from Hong Kong in five years” before reemerging on the sofa ten minutes later.

Trying to fathom the unsolvable enigma of how long Ish is staying has been compared with trying to define reality or explain the meaning of life.

“He’s tricked us so many times I feel like my brain has been violated” said a living room squatter “whenever we ask him about a prospective departure he stops talking normally and a substance that looks suspiciously like s**t starts flowing freely out of his mouth.”

Scientists have attempted to work out the probability that Ish will stay forever, but point out that results are hopelessly skewed by the incalculable number of times Ish claims he will leave ‘in the next half hour or so’.

“I just really get off on leaving and arriving at places” said Ish “my problem is that I love ‘hello’s and ‘goodbye’s so much that I don’t mind completely destroying the integrity of my word in order to get as many of them as possible. They just give me such a buzz.”

22/04/2013

Eddie grows elf ears

In a shocking development, Eddie “Leddie” Richards has sprouted elf ears.

Richards’ identity has become unstable following extensive bingeing of Lord of the Rings on PS3. It is reported that he is forgetting who he is in favour of thinking that he is an elf wizard, and that this has begun to manifest itself in his appearance.

Witness Ryan Hall said: “Sometimes we’ll be in the sitting room watching something and he’ll thrust his hands out in front of him, make hissing noises and waggle his fingers, claiming that he is ‘doing magic’.

“Then one morning he comes out of his room and his ears are pointed.”

“When we try to discuss it with him he just won't talk to us. He says he needs to save his magicka.”

Richards, when asked to comment, simply said: “Psshttttshhhhht!! Double damage!!”

17/03/2013

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7eWudERDgs

you say LITERALLY too much

During his first visit to London, Hannibal talks about why he likes being in the country and using Scottish money in English pubs.

14/12/2012

how jokes is this ?!

There's a problem with Brighton's Christmas lights Merry Christmas... http://www.facebook.com/PokeHQ https://twitter.com/thepoke http://www.thepoke.co.uk/

09/12/2012

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25/11/2012

haha who is this touching Ish's crotch?

18/11/2012

wake up poooossaaayyyyyyyysssssssss

07/11/2012

We don't mean to be slags or anything but this bra has been hanging on our TV for about a month now, please if this is yours (they are 34C's - nice rack on that) contact us by direct message.

04/11/2012

M-Cat is a pooooooosay