Bring the Krampus to the USA

Bring the Krampus to the USA Saving American children by terrifying the little monsters. America, your children are starting to suck. They're lazy, stupid and more spoiled than ever.

They lounge around all the time playing first-person shooter video games (there's a smart idea) while thinking LOL and DTF are actual words they should get credit for knowing how to spell. So since you parents are just as bad in a lot of cases, enough concerned Americans are banding together to beseech the dark underworld of Europe to send the Krampus to our shores. The Krampus is a holiday demon

who deals with the naughty kids. Forget Santa's Naughty List, this beast means business: the Krampus not only terrorizes the bad kids, but he's also credited for kidnapping and eating them as well. Okay, so it's not that festive and heartwarming to unleash a hideous demon on children...but until they start straightening up and knock off the whining, let's allow the monster to keep your spoiled, stupid spawn in line. Join the cause!

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P.O. Box 2596
Peoria, AZ
85380

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