31/10/2026
We've been going over Andy's checklist and it says we need cash so if the 90% of you that pay card could start paying cash that would be great, it is king after all. Also, we're taking applications for those wanting to wait it out in the sanctuary of the Tavern. Priority will be given to those that have a very special set of skills eg foraging mushrooms and berries without resulting in death, and people who can turn wee into diesel or kerosene (we're not fussy.) It would also help if you didnt like w**e so there will be more for me. Closing date for applications is 999 days.
Obvious this is a joke (except the cash bit π) before anyone starts. We are British we make light if a bad situation its what we do.